THE PARTY-PONY

So, there's this phenomenon out there... or at least it seems like one to me... Some sort of unexplainable force that allows nearly every girl in the world (not me) to "rock" a ponytail. You know, "to rock" teen/cheap fashion magazine slang for "wear well." And I see girls-- around town, on campus, in the gym, on red carpets-- who manage to wear a ponytail well, as if it's calculated into their overall ensemble. Here are some examples:

ZOOEY DESCHANEL, PONY PRO

 BLAKE LIVELY, PONY PRINCESS

 SARAH JESSICA PARKER, REIGNING QUEEN OF THE PONYTAIL

I feel obliged to say here that I'm fairly proficient when it comes to styling hair... but the ponytail is my bête noir. When ever I attempt a pony tail, no matter how much I comb, spray, prod, straighten, curl, torch, it always looks like my hasty plan B. Even though it had been my plan A, and I spent thirty-five unsuccessful minutes attempting to wrangle it into something proper.


I have never, in my life, "rocked" a pony tail... until today.


Today, I gave myself a party-pony, and then I gave it a new name. It took planning, perseverance, and panache, but I did it. And it all started when the thought struck me that I will never, ever be one of those people who can wear a fancy pony. When magazines tout the elegance of the formal pony, I am not the target audience. Then and there, I made up my mind to challenge that notion. 


So this morning, I washed my hair (never the precursor for a great hair day), then used a blow dryer. First, I flipped it upside down until it was about 2/3 dry. Then I flipped it back right side up and pointed the blow dryer straight back level with the top of my head. I kept it pointing back, occasionally angling down the back of my head while moving from ear to ear. I also used the blow dryer to create some volume on top, and I brushed the pony section. The results! My god! Admittedly, this is the first time I approached my "work hair" (recall I work in a deli) with so much diligence, but I am thoroughly pleased. 


It's the classic, soda-fountain bouncy, fun-loving, innocent, Grace Kelly pony I'd always dreamed of. I mean, this puppy is sleek. Alas, while I may one day have the good fortune to recreate this thing of wonder, it will just have to live on in my memory since no photos were taken. Like a unicorn.


Lesson learned: You can't have a bad day when you have a party-pony.

Kate Beckinsale shows us the meaning of the phrase "party pony"

Or when you watch this video: